“I can’t be late to school again!
They’ll mark me tardy in red pen
And who knows what will happen then?”,
“We should throw away my bed
And get a catapult instead
To fire me out and overhead!”,
“And this alarm clock isn’t right
We should set up and ignite
A 40,000 watt spotlight!
“Changing clothes is such a waste
Of time that’s better spent in haste.
I’ll have them permanently placed
“The flight of stairs just slows my stride.
We should switch it with a slide
For the quickest slickest ride
“And what about the family car?
It seems to be a bit subpar-
A rocket’s best from where we are
And Glen had lots of good designs
From breakfast served on sharp inclines
To ways to cut the bathroom lines.
He shared another thought or ten
Then walked out proudly from the den
And looked up at the clock and then…
Saw that he was late again.
The potatoes have eyes
And to my surprise,
The corn has ears as well,
And on my walks,
The celery stalks,
As far as I can tell.
It’s true, I dread
The lettuce head
My way but I’m in denial.
I’m in constant fear
Of the vegetables here,
Here in the produce aisle.
Tall people like their ice cream in sundaes.
Short people prefer theirs in cones.
People in glasses text a lot
While those in hats talk on their phones.
People with blonde hair wear green on Mondays
While people with red hair wear blue.
There are a lot of things that we can prove
With a sample size of two.
Hey! So, now in the process of finalizing all of the files for our book and I come to this wonderful little hurdle. The AUTHOR BIO. This feels so strange. Now, I’m getting ready to take professional photos tomorrow morning in an effort to convince somebody that I’m a responsible adult, and trying to write all about myself in a pleasant, interesting and marginally mature manner.
So, it’s not surprising that I can’t take it seriously. Check out my first draft!
WE DID IT!!
Thank you all so much for being a part of this journey with us! Thanks to your amazing support, in only 30 days, we raised $21,000 from 324 backers to help us turn “Could You Hug a Cactus?” into a real book. We’re going to be working very hard over the next few months to get the book and other rewards made and into your hands as fast as possible. We will keep you in the loop on our progress and make sure you know where we are every step of the way. If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to get in touch.
Hey everyone! Thank you so much for your support! Being able to know that we are making this book is incredible and we couldn’t have done it without you! For those who haven’t already checked it out, preorders are still going on until September 9th on the Kickstarter page, so you can still get it on the action and get a bunch of cool extras for being a part of the launch!
Awesome news! Spencer Smith and I are working hard to make a real, hold-in-your-hand 40-page book of poetry called Could You Hug A Cactus?! With the incredible help and insight of Mike Matola, we were able to carefully choose a selection of my poems to include in the collection, and Spencer painted some incredible illustrations in full acrylic for the book… as you can see!
Spencer’s ability to capture the essence of the character is on full display with this art from Hero
Right now, we’ve got a Facebook page set up that we’re updating regularly and on August 10th, we’ll be launching our Kickstarter! Please join us as we work to get our first book off the ground!