Meaning. Full Nonsense.

I create to enable people to be emphatically themselves.

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Legs

Legs
  • Project Nutter Words
  • Role Illustrated, Created
  • Medium Illustration
  • Character Legs
  • Year 2026

Kernie

Kernie
  • Project Nutter Words
  • Role Illustrated
  • Character Kernie
  • Year 2026

Shelliott Celebrates

Shelliott Celebrates
  • Project Nutter Words
  • Role Illustrated
  • Medium Illustration
  • Client Personal
  • Character Shelliott
  • Year 2026

Relaxing Almo

Relaxing Almo
  • Project Nutter Words
  • Role Illustrated, Created
  • Medium Illustration
  • Client Personal
  • Character Almo
  • Year 2026

Hide & Seek 9

  • Project Ghost & Ninja
  • Role Wrote, Illustrated, Created
  • Medium Comic
  • Character Ghost, Ninja
  • Year 2024

Hide & Seek 8

  • Project Ghost & Ninja
  • Role Wrote, Illustrated, Created
  • Medium Comic
  • Character Ghost, Ninja
  • Year 2024

Hide & Seek 7

  • Project Ghost & Ninja
  • Role Wrote, Created, Illustrated
  • Medium Comic
  • Character Ghost, Ninja
  • Year 2024

Hide & Seek 6

  • Project Ghost & Ninja
  • Role Illustrated, Wrote, Created
  • Medium Comic
  • Character Ghost, Ninja
  • Year 2024

Hide & Seek 5

  • Project Ghost & Ninja
  • Role Wrote, Created, Illustrated
  • Medium Comic
  • Character Ghost, Ninja
  • Year 2024

Hide & Seek 4

  • Project Ghost & Ninja
  • Role Wrote, Illustrated, Created
  • Medium Comic
  • Character Ghost, Ninja
  • Year 2024

Hide & Seek 3

  • Project Ghost & Ninja
  • Role Wrote, Illustrated, Created
  • Medium Comic
  • Character Ghost, Ninja
  • Year 2024

Hide & Seek 2

  • Project Ghost & Ninja
  • Role Illustrated, Wrote, Created
  • Medium Comic
  • Character Ghost, Ninja
  • Year 2024

Hide & Seek 1

  • Project Ghost & Ninja
  • Role Wrote, Illustrated
  • Medium Comic
  • Client Personal
  • Character Ghost, Ninja
  • Year 2024

Ninja

Ninja
  • Project Ghost & Ninja
  • Role Illustrated
  • Medium Illustration
  • Client Personal
  • Character Ninja
  • Year 2024

Ghost

Ghost
  • Project Ghost & Ninja
  • Role Illustrated
  • Medium Illustration
  • Client Personal
  • Character Ghost
  • Year 2024

Catchphrase University

Kyle Brandt (CBS Sports) seeks out Jack Black when he needs to master a new catchphase.

EP: Desiree Guarino
Producer: Sarah Makarewicz
DP: Jonathan Hall
Production Designer: Petra Vasvari
Writer: Alex Piliouras & Gina Cucci

  • Project Kung-Fu Panda 4
  • Role Directed
  • Medium Video
  • Client Universal Pictures, CBS Sports
  • Year 2024

The Skadoosh Conspiracy

In promotion of the upcoming Kung Fu Panda 4, Universal and The Daily Show brought out "The Big Guns", aka Michael Kosta, to uncover the secret behind the "Skadoosh" conspiracy.

Filmed at St. John's University, Staten Island campus during its final semester.

Written by Alex Piliouras

  • Project Kung-Fu Panda 4
  • Role Directed
  • Medium Video
  • Client Universal Pictures
  • Year 2024

Nickelodeon Holiday Gift Guide

  • Role Directed, Creative Direction
  • Medium Video
  • Client Nickelodeon
  • Year 2023

Mystery Sips, Dance Battle Slips, Blindfolded Fits w/ Dalia Chavez

The squad is back on Barbie™ DreamMaker with host Dalia Chavez! Our 6 kid creators tackle a new set of thrilling Barbie™-themed challenges to unlock accessories and fill the Barbie DreamHouse™ playset. Improv challenges, Barbie™ impressions, cake decorating, mysterious drinks – it all comes together for a surprise celebration at the end (hint: it’s cheesy!).

New here? Catch up with Barbie™ Doll Fits, Pink Mystery Foods, Trick Shots (& Puppies! Shhh) Barbie DreamMaker™

  • Project Barbie Dream Maker
  • Role Creative Direction, Directed
  • Medium Video
  • Client Barbie, Mattel
  • Year 2023

Barbie Doll Fits, Pink Mystery Foods, Trick Shots (& Puppies! Shhhh!)

When 6 kids get hype in a Barbie-themed house, they go from strangers to BFFs as they complete 7(!) content challenges hosted by Dalia Chavez—making dance videos, mystery drawings, fashion remakes, trick shots, and eating pink mystery foods– to unlock accessories for the Barbie DreamHouse playset and earn an adorable surprise celebration! And see what they dream up in the next Barbie DreamMaker!

  • Project Barbie Dream Maker
  • Role Creative Direction, Directed
  • Medium Video
  • Client Barbie
  • Year 2023

Storytime For Parents

UnderstandAD was looking for a new way to reach and educate the parents of young kids with atopic dermatitis (eczema), so we developed an original kids' book starring Blue and an original felt friend, "Frida", who suffers from the condition. In support of the campaign, we created this video to promote the book and UnderstandAD's messaging.

Writer: Rachel Stern
Art Director: David Hamed
DP: Chris Hamilton

  • Project Storytime For Parents
  • Role Directed, Creative Direction
  • Medium Video
  • Client UnderstandAD, Nickelodeon
  • Year 2023

Pressley Is LIVE w/ Mashed Olives, Mess-A-Tron & Geoffrey the Giraffe

Welcome to the season premiere of the finale of Pressley’s messy new talk show, Nickelodeon’s WhAM: What a Mess! With the Toys”R”Us Mascot Geoffrey the Giraffe by her side, she sits down with impossible trivia questions inspired by his world travels to Dubai, Jerusalem, and Hong Kong. Plus, a special performance from the Merry Messy Trio – Hydrated Sand, Mashed Olives, and Victoria Harbour Concentrate.

  • Project WHAM!
  • Role Creative Direction, Directed
  • Medium Video
  • Client Toys R Us
  • Year 2023

Pressley Makes Messy Trivia an ART w/ Geoffrey the Giraffe

This time on Nickelodeon’s WhAM: What a Mess! Toys“R”Us mascot Geoffrey the Giraffe has loaded Pressley’s palette with questions and messes inspired by his travels to Melbourne, Madrid, and Durban. And remember one wrong answer paints the canvas and Pressley!

  • Project WHAM!
  • Role Creative Direction, Directed
  • Medium Video
  • Client Toys R Us
  • Year 2023

Pressley Plays Trivia w/ MESSY Consequences & Geoffrey the Giraffe

Who’s in the mood for authentic New York Pizza – LIQUIFIED?! Welcome to Nickelodeon’s WhAM: What a Mess! The Toys”R”Us mascot Geoffrey Giraffe visited New York, Singapore, and London on a world tour, and now those travels inspire the questions and messes Pressley takes on!

  • Project WHAM!
  • Role Creative Direction, Directed
  • Medium Video
  • Client Toys R Us
  • Year 2023

My First Barbie - Big Sister

Nathan Kress (from iCarly) keeps an eye on his (IRL) daughter Rosie as she wants whatever her big sister, Aria has. When Rosie reaches for Aria's Barbie, Nathan knows just how to save the day.

Launch campaign for Mattel's My First Barbie, first aired 3/6/23

Cast: Nathan Kress, Rosie, Aria

  • Role Directed
  • Medium Video
  • Client Barbie, Mattel
  • Year 2023

I Can Prove You Love You

I can prove you love you
Deep down in your heart
When it beats each second for you
Never stopping from the start.

I can prove you love you
In each nerve (you have a lot)
When you move your hand so quickly
When you’re touching something hot

I can prove you love you
Your reactions give away
Your desire to be protective
Over who you are each day

I can prove you love you
Through the comfort that you feel
When you’re buried in your blankets
Or you’ve eaten a good meal

The you that loves you loves you
Loves you deep down in each cell
From that microscopic level
You are wishing yourself well

And when the thoughts you build on top
Stay honest, deeply true
Then you can’t help but love yourself
As much as you love you.

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2023

All The No's

All the NO’s that they can throw
Don't mean an awful lot
If you just try your best more times
Than all the NO’s they got.

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2022

Shake & Shimmy

  • Project Nerf Blast-Off!
  • Role Wrote, Creative Direction, Directed
  • Medium Video
  • Client Hasbro, NERF
  • Year 2022

Lob & Bobble

  • Project Nerf Blast-Off!
  • Role Wrote, Creative Direction, Directed
  • Medium Video
  • Client Hasbro, NERF
  • Year 2022

Snag & Scramble

  • Project Nerf Blast-Off!
  • Role Creative Direction, Directed, Wrote
  • Medium Video
  • Client Hasbro, NERF
  • Year 2021

Tube & Loop

  • Project Nerf Blast-Off!
  • Role Directed, Creative Direction, Wrote
  • Medium Video
  • Client NERF, Hasbro
  • Year 2021

Composing A Closing

There is a lot to be said for finishing strong! No matter how hard you work, or how well you do something, the ending is often the thing that people remember the most.

So... In the final episode of season one, our four poets will help show us some great ways to finish stanzas, lines, and poems! At the same time, we'll finish up season one for a little while too.

Poems:

  • If I Were An Animal by JuNe
  • Spring Has Sprung by Isa
  • Fishy by Landon K
  • I Want It by Jayne
  • Project Poet Show It
  • Role Hosted, Created, Edited, Wrote
  • Medium Video
  • Client Lake Orion Public Schools
  • Year 2020

Unheard Words

Sometimes the things we don’t say, can say the most! Implied meanings, hidden clues, and cliff-hanger endings can make our poems even more interesting…

In this episode of Poet, Show It!, Phil celebrates poems from four incredible poets as they each say something by not saying something.

Poems:

  • Two Sisters by Eddie
  • Gympie Gympie by Addie
  • Watson by Addie
  • Backyard by Magna
  • Project Poet Show It
  • Role Wrote, Edited, Created, Hosted
  • Medium Video
  • Client Lake Orion Public Schools
  • Year 2020

No Rules! Just Tools

There are NO RULES in poetry. You can write what you want, how you want, where you want! But there are some useful tools that can help make your poems more powerful…

In this episode of Poet, Show It!, Phil celebrates poems from four incredible poets as they each use some poetry tools especially well.

Poems:

Pop’s Penguin Picture by KC Miller

My Playset by Parker

Our Pet by Sydney & Rachel

Fishy by Aaron

  • Project Poet Show It
  • Role Hosted, Wrote, Edited, Created
  • Medium Video
  • Client Lake Orion Public Schools
  • Year 2020

Celebrate What's Great

Taking the time to celebrate the things we enjoy can be super powerful – it puts us in a great mood, gives us lots of poetry ideas, and it can be REALLY FUN!

In this episode of Poet, Show It!, Phil celebrates poems from four incredible poets as they each celebrate something in their life that they love!

Poems:

Pink Blankie by Sophie

Bike Ride by Gabes

Dogs and Cats by V

Candy by Cloudy

  • Project Poet Show It
  • Role Edited, Hosted, Created, Wrote
  • Medium Video
  • Client Lake Orion Public Schools
  • Year 2020

Trueness & Newness

There is something magical about the “Aha!” moment, the moment we learn something new and it just clicks. Poetry is an amazing tool for gifting those moments to people.

In this episode of Poet, Show It!, Phil celebrates poems from four incredible poets as they each deliver a fresh perspective, and maybe an “Aha!” moment, through their writing.

Poems Featured:

  • The View From My Throat by Emma
  • Minecraft by Peter
  • Spring by Ellie
  • An Overactive Imagination by Caitlin
  • Project Poet Show It
  • Role Hosted, Created, Wrote, Edited
  • Medium Video
  • Client Lake Orion Public Schools
  • Year 2020

Better Together

Being “together” involves so much more than just being in the same place, whether that’s hanging out together, working together, or playing in band together.

In this episode of Poet, Show It!, Phil celebrates poems from four incredible poets as they each explore what it means to them (and how it makes them feel) to be together.

Poems Featured:

  • Dolls by Annalise
  • Alone By The Phone by Noelle
  • I Love My School by Liv
  • Summer by Lily
  • Project Poet Show It
  • Role Hosted, Edited, Created, Wrote
  • Medium Video
  • Client Lake Orion Public Schools
  • Year 2020

Range of Change

Change can happen in a lot of different ways, but one thing is for sure - it's going to happen. In this episode of Poet, Show It!, Phil celebrates poems from three incredible poets as they each talk about change in their own unique way!

Poems Featured:

  • Caterpillars by Aubrey Mae
  • Easter 2020 by Luca
  • My Loose Tooth by Maisie
  • Crazy Soccer Ball by Sash
  • Project Poet Show It
  • Role Wrote, Created, Edited, Hosted
  • Medium Video
  • Client Lake Orion Public Schools
  • Year 2020

Stretch Wide Inside

We're all a little cramped right now, but it helps to stretch and make room to feel all of our emotions. In this episode of Poet, Show It!, Phil celebrates poems from three incredible poets as they take us on an emotional journey from dealing with being #SafeInside to appreciating our strange friends!

Special thanks to Dan Dabrowski and Lake Orion Community Schools for making this possible. The amazing students of Lake Orion sent even more awesome poems over the past week, and more of them will continue to be featured in upcoming episodes.

Poems Featured:

  • The Call by Brock
  • I Feel Happy by PD
  • My Feeling Poem by Lukas
  • My Friends by Jude
  • Project Poet Show It
  • Role Wrote, Edited, Created, Hosted
  • Medium Video
  • Client Lake Orion Public Schools
  • Year 2020

Respond Beyond

If everything we do is a response to something else, then the way we respond to things shows the world who we are!

In this episode of Poet, Show It!, poet Phillip Van Wagoner celebrates poems from four incredible poets as they show us how to use poetry to respond, either to an author, or to each other, or even within the same poem!

Special thanks to Dan Dabrowski and Lake Orion Community Schools for making this possible. The amazing students of Lake Orion sent even more awesome poems over the past week, and more of them will continue to be featured in upcoming episodes.

Poems Featured

  • If You Give A Mouse A Bed by Nikita
  • Silly Fruit by Kylie
  • Robot Boy by Ethan Cupcake by Leah
  • Project Poet Show It
  • Role Hosted, Created, Edited, Wrote
  • Medium Video
  • Client Lake Orion Public Schools
  • Year 2020

Beginning Is Winning

Beginning anything is difficult. We don't know what people will think, or if we'll be good at it - but that's also what makes it so special. The only way to find out what's going to happen is to start!

In the pilot episode of Poet, Show It!, poet Phillip Van Wagoner celebrates three incredible poems from three incredible poets, all highlighting the value of creativity and imagination!

Special thanks to Dan Dabrowski and Lake Orion Community Schools for making this possible. The amazing students of Lake Orion sent a boatload of awesome poems over the past week, and more of them will continue to be featured in upcoming episodes.

Poems Featured In Episode 1

  • Pencils by Miyu
  • Imagination by Nicholas
  • Roses Are Red by Bboy
  • Project Poet Show It
  • Role Created, Hosted, Wrote, Edited
  • Medium Video
  • Client Lake Orion Public Schools
  • Year 2020

American Girl and the Action Guy

An American Girl saw an Action Guy
As the Action Guy was hopping by
And the American Girl called out “HI!”

“Hi ,right back” said the Action Guy
“How nice to find a friend nearby
I was out from my fort and wandered by”

The American Girl said “Action Guy,
There’s something I noticed as you bounced on by
Do you mind if I ask you a question “why?”

“Why not?” replied the Action Guy
I have nothing to hide from a prying eye
You can ask and I’ll answer, or at least I’ll try

“Okay” said the American Girl, then “Why
Do you have a giant hand around your thigh?
And why does your voice come out of the sky?”

“Well,” paused the thoughtful Action Guy
“The hand helps me move and the voice, reply
And sometimes the hand will help me fly!”

The American Girl, no longer shy,
Asked “but do you ever wonder ‘why?’
Why is there a hand around my thigh?”

“Well that’s my Kendan” said Action Guy,
“We’re a team, me and him. He and I.
And I don’t do much but lay and lie
When he isn’t there to help me try.
Can I ask one back”? Asked Action Guy

“Of course” said American Girl, “and I
Will answer well or at least I’ll try
I have no reason to be sly.”

“Okay” began the Action Guy,
What about the hand around your thigh?
And why does your voice come out of the sky?”

“That’s Kylyn” said American Girl, “she’s why
I get up and go and make music or pie
And I stand tall instead of just standing by
And I love her and don’t want to say goodbye
But sometimes I just wonder “why?”

“Well” thought the Action Guy
“Have your ever thought about why
There are legs on a table or wings on a fly?
A table doesn’t ‘table’ if it doesn’t stand high
And what kind of a fly is a fly that won’t fly?
So would I be an Action Guy
Without my Kendan and his action supply?”

And American Girl said “I think that I
Understand what you mean or mean to imply.
There’s no such thing as ME or I
That is separate from WE, that’s why
We are the help we get that helps us fly.
I am my Kylyn and my Kylyn is I!”

“Sounds good to me” said Action Guy
“Now did I hear you mention pie?
And might you have a slice for I?”

A special poem for Kendan and Kylyn (and their favorite toys)

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2020

Report Card

In Spelling, my F’s for ‘phenomenal’
In Math, my D has a plus!
In Science, my E is for ‘Excellent Work’
And I even got a note from the bus!

In Music, I mastered the key of C
In Gym, my F is for fast
And my History teacher said “see you next year”
Cause he wants to relive the past

My final report card just came in
Without one “A”nnoying or “B”ad!
My mom’s so excited she’s yelling at me
“Just wait til I show your dad!”

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2019

One Year

One year’s far too long for food on a plate,
Or to stand in a line and wait wait wait wait
One year feels like forty with nothing to do,
But goes by in a blink when I spend it with you.

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2019

Fish Poem

In a river
By a tree
A little fish
Once said to me

Life flows and goes
And so do I
If I hold on
Life pass me by

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2019

When We're At Ninja Warrior

We will breeze past the obstacles
We will not fall down
When Ninja Warrior
Comes to town

We won’t break a sweat
It’ll be such a breeze
That C. Katanzaro
Will see us at ease

We won’t trip or stumble
We won’t even slow
While we seek out our seats
In the third or fourth row.

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2018

The Hottest Day All Summer

The Hottest Day All Summer

It was hot. Very hot. Did we mention the heat?
As we sat on the stoop south of Sanderson Street.

When sweet Sam came to chat, he was covered in sweat
And then stuttered - the heat must have made him forget.

When Mike pedaled over, his tires almost popped
So he had to keep going, he couldn’t have stopped.

Hunky Hank couldn’t leave from the shade to say “hi."
Skater Sid caught a breeze so he kept rolling by.

Winston waved from his window and Todd sent a text
But it only said 🔥 and nothing came next…

The thermometer maxed out at one twenty three!
(The only thing hotter was Jeanie - and me.)

illustration by Elena Matheu

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2018

Home Run

I’m pretty sure that baseball made it’s way to outer space
For I hit it really far and really hard
And I could kind of tell that when he threw it ‘cross the plate
It wasn’t going to stay here in the yard

It may have smashed the ozone as it left the atmosphere
I hope the scientists don’t get upset
But the greatest slugger ever just sent one into space
And we haven’t left the second inning yet

Once it disappeared beyond the clouds and out of view
I heard the crowds all gasp and cheer and shout.
‘Cause when I swing my bat and hit a satellite like that-
Wait! What do you mean I’m OUT!??

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2017

Offer To Help

I wanted to help
And to do something nice
So I went up to Rod
And I offered. Twice!
I told him, “it's fine,”
"Take a break from the fuss.”
He told me "Sit down!"
"You can not drive the bus!"

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2017

Our Trip To The Moon

A ladder is not long enough.
A cannon isn’t strong enough.

No mountain’s nearly high enough
No plane could ever fly enough

A rocket ship can make it there
But astronauts don’t like to share.

So while I’d love to go with you
We might need something else to do…

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2017

Unseen Jean

There's a girl at school you haven't met.
Her name is unseen Jean.

She hasn’t turned thirteen yet.
Her name is preteen unseen Jean.

She likes to make students upset.
Her name is mean preteen unseen Jean.

But you’ll never see her sweat
Her name is clean mean preteen unseen Jean.

She has a sweater that she wears.
Her name is green clean mean preteen unseen Jean.

An attitude that says “who cares?"
Her name is serene green clean mean preteen unseen Jean.

And seven thousand teddy bears
They call her queen serene green clean mean preteen unseen Jean.

She takes when she goes WAY downstairs
In her queen serene green clean mean preteen unseen Jean submarine.

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2016

____ Poem

I am made for hiding
But I’m always on display
To grab me is a penalty
Yet I'm held when people play

My expression never changes
And yet the sight of me
Can summon yells or laughter
Or fear to great degree

To see through this illusion
Is not a heady task
For my very own description
Unveils me as ________.

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2016

Love Songs

I don’t believe in love songs anymore
I think that they’ve got it all wrong.
It’s just so contrived to claim someone alive
Can live up to the words of a song.

Nobody’s hair frames features so fair,
Nobody’s eyes are like oceans.
There’s no girl or boy with a look
Or a glimpse that can stir up such tender emotions.

Noone’s impression can keep you from sleep;
Send you tossing through yearning all night.
Nobody’s breathless replies in your dreams
Will portend such pure love at first sight.

I don’t believe in love songs anymore
And I find their inference unkind,
But if you disagree (and you like what you see)
I’d be open to changing my mind...

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2016

Shapes

It’s up to you to grow
In the way you want to go.
The shape that you will take
Is up to you to make.

Your outshape can be strong
Or clean and lean and long
Or soft and bendy too
It’s really up to you

Your topshape can be fluff
Or long, if there’s enough
Or one giant spike
Or anything you like

Your brainshape can invent
Recall the place it went
Or crack a joke real quick
Or anything you pick

Your inshape can be mean
And always make a scene
Or generous and warm
Or take a funny form.

The means are there to make
The shape you want to take.
A book, or weight, or tool
Or class inside a school.

So, find a shape you love
And can’t stop thinking of
A shape you want to be
Your favorite shape of “me".

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2016

The Monster's Apology

Well this is the worst night that we’ve ever had.
I scheduled the scaring and now I feel bad.

Wolfman, you showed up, the demons did too;
I’m sorry, my fiends, that there’s nothing to do.

The wraith’s rightly angry, and so are the ghouls,
But the kid’s under blankets… and those are the rules

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2015

Smelling Flowers

If they say their flowers smell really good.
It’s nice to walk over and give them a smell.

But I would be careful about where I stood
If they said that their flowers smell really well…

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2015

Stinking Kids

“Stinking kids and all their racket,
Late night noise, and no good acts!”
“Stinking kids out in my garden
Rooting through for late night snacks.”

“Stinking kids with all their howling,
Growling, digging in my yard;
Tearing through my trash and thrashing
With such blatant disregard!”

“Stinking kids with all their claw marks,
Clawing up my garden gate.”
“Digging up my sweet potatoes,
Leaving scraps of things they ate...”

(I’m not here to argue with him
About what does or does not stink
But whatever’s wrecking Old Jon’s garden
Is not ‘stinking kids’, I think.)

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2015

Mistakes

Sometimes you make mistakes
And everything just breaks
The more you try to fix
The more the problem sticks
And nothing goes as planned
Please know I understand
When this happens to you
(Cause it happens to me too)

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2015

Oh, Brother

My sister’s not as great as she will tell you.
She says she does a lot that isn’t true
She claims she really "gets the best of me",
She gets my worst and doesn’t have a clue.

She says she knows just how to "push my buttons"
But I have zero buttons to be pressed!
I’m not some metal robot or computer!
I’m just the brother of a pushy pest!

She says she "gets my goat" but I don’t get it
I’ve never had a goat that could be gotten!

I do not own a farm or any livestock
My sister is the only thing that's rotten!

She tells me that she’s "tying me in knots"
She’s not 'cause I’m not knotted, not at all!

I’m standing on the ground and yet she argues
“I’m really driving you right up the wall”!

I’m certain that my eyes see all the colors
But she insists she “has me seeing red”!!
She claims she got “underneath my skin”!!!
Then apparently got up “inside my head”!!!

I wonder when she thinks I “ate my heart out"
Then wore the rest of it out “on my sleeve"
She even tells me that she knows my pet
But I’ve never even heard of any “peeve”!!!!

She always says she’s “ruffling my feathers”,
As if I am some kind of squawking bird!!!
Or mentions “steam that's coming out my ears"
But obviously not cause I still heard!

My mouth is not foaming!
My lid hasn’t flipped!
She hasn’t “beaten me" to any “punch"
I’m not in a “tizzy"
My “shoulder’s" not “chipped"
And my panties are certainly not in a bunch!!!

My sister is awful!
Her lying is bad!
She makes up these stories
And it MAKES ME SO MAD!!!

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2015

Home Is Where You Hang Your Hat

I went to visit my dear Pap and
Left behind a baseball cap and
Didn’t worry when it happened.

I took with me a cowboy hat when
I hung out with my friend Matt, then
Left behind that western fashion.

I hung out with Jan and Jeannie,
Left behind my yellow beanie,
Ran home smiling (should’ve seen me)

Hanging out with Sam was swell, met
Steve and Sarah both as well, yet
Walked away without my helmet.

You might find it odd or random,
The fine headgear I abandon
At Bill’s or Brenda’s or at Brandon’s.

But truly the fact of the case is
I leave my hats in lot of places
So I have homes in lots of spaces
Around a lot of friendly faces.

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2014

Bad Dad Games

"I got your nose!"
My Dad loved to play
I yelled "give it back!"
But he took it away.

Then I had no more nose
On the front of my head
And could not wear my glasses
And then my mom said...

"You've got your Dad's eyes"
Then he took back the set
So I had no more eyes
And was getting upset

I told Mom the truth
"This is really a bother"
She told me right back
"You sound just like your father"

So he took my mouth too!
And then, with that missin'
I sat there and heard
"He'll just never listen!"

And that was the last thing
That I got to hear
For he popped'em right off
First the right, then left ear

Now I sit where I sit
Cause I put up a stink
But they can't take my mind -
Um… I don't think...

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2014

Not Yet

We haven't met
A creature yet
That didn't come from here

We haven't shook
A hand or hook
Not from our little sphere

So as we stare
In to the sky
We know we've just begun

There's lots of space
Outside this place
For awful lots of fun

  • Project The Neverending Childrens Book
  • Role Wrote
  • Medium Poem
  • Client Scribble Fiction
  • Year 2014